You Oght to be in Pictures

These are my fellow film makers from the Digital Histories class and our advisors Gary and Christine.  It was a fun time to watch their finished projects up on the big screen.  I have to admit, age does add an edgy freedom to their creativity.  You can watch the collection of films on Vimeo at:

https://vimeo.com/album/4574086

password: DH2017

I was impressed by and enjoyed all of them, buy I have to admit my favorites were "With Help from my Friends"  and "Mottainai".  "A Matter of Truth" gave me a better understanding of the political propaganda regarding the camps.  Watching these again motivates me to improve my skills in creating stories to the level of my fellow classmates.

Canneling Rod Serling

Did I mention that returning to work is like a episode of the Twilight Zone?   It is as if I never left.  I was plopped down into the same circumstances as when I left in July.  There seems to be a sigh of relief from everyone, that I am OK (you look good!) and that my return signals a return of sanity in a sea of unpredictability.  Go figure.

It has gotten to the point where I have to go back and review my previous posts of this blog to remind me of the process of life that I had gone through these past 10 months. 

Neuropathy is still the lingering reminder of the cancer.  At times it intensifies where I find myself shaking my hands and flexing my fingers, especially when it gets cold.  For some reason, it will flare up in the middle of the night.  A co worker has described it as your extremities (hands and feet) are constantly asleep.

I found it ironic that I have received a positive response from my video project on Sunday.  I was not thrilled with the way it turned out and I could tell by the luke warm reaction from Gayle was that it was so - so and a little hard to follow.  The response may be leading to another project on Asian basketball and it's origins.

We just got back from Santa Barbara to witness for ourselves that the youngest graduated college in four years.  It is a sigh of relief, now lets see about employment!

Hi Ho, Hi Ho, It's Off to Work I Go....

I started back at work on Friday.  It was a process of trying to get set up before I hit the ground running on Monday.  The best way of describing the experience is the Twilight Zone.  It was if I never left.  The commute was the same, even driving up to my usual spot in the parking structure. The office was the same as I left it with an additional layer of dust.  The adjustment was catching up with personnel changes and what has occurred in peoples' lives these past months.

The biggest adjustment was waking up at six in the morning.  I did come home and take a long nap at the end of the day.  Oh well.

Today was the showing of my video I had created on basketball referees.  A friend had convinced me to join a Seniors Video Class sponsored by Visual Communications called Digital Histories.  It was established about 13 years ago with the intent of documenting peoples lives through the use of video.

The projects are then showed at the Asian Arts Festival at the Aratani Theater in Little Tokyo.  It is a little intimidating to see your project on a full movie screen in a mid size theater.

They keep emphasizing that as seniors, we bring a different perspective and therefore are in tune to document those stories.  Two questions come up.  One, when did I become a senior? and two, when did the senior perspective become so significant?  The answer, both are inevitable.

It has become clear that stories need to be documented and available, and time is short.  In conversation with a friend, it was stated that it was too bad we didn't do this 20 years ago when her dad was still alive.  But the program is a product of timing, where technology has enabled us to easily record and edit.  Any digital camera and a computer with iMovie will enable anyone to create a video.  The issue then becomes one of availability.  The internet and You Tube has resolved that issue.  More to come.

http://festival.vconline.org/2017/shorts-programs/digital-histories/

Land of Brick and BBQ

We went to visit the grandkids for a few days last week in Texas.  Im feeling better and it was Gayle's spring break.  This was my first time visiting the Lonestar state.  My first impression of the Plano/Allen area of Dallas was Orange county about 30 years ago.  Newly developed and lots of open land.  Gas stations were huge and selling gas for about $2.30 per gallon.  there were the usual nationwide chains (including the SC palm tree emblazoned In and Out).  

I did not notice much of a southern accent among the natives, but it did remind me of my days in Vancouver Wash.  Asians are still a subtle but noticeable sighting.  According to the internet, asians (mostly Chinese) make up 14% of the population in those suburbs.

The weather can best be described as unpredictable.  We woke up to 80 degree weather with a breeze,  and went to sleep with thunder, lightning and rain.  Hail was reported in the adjacent communities.

The highlight of the trip next to seeing the grandkids was the visit to the Dallas Textbook Depository Museum (officially called The Sixth Floor Museum at Dealey Plaza), the sight of the assassination of president Kennedy.  We both can distinctly recall when Kennedy was shot.  Gayle was at home and remembers telling her mom that president Kennedy was shot.  I was in class, 3rd grade, Miss Coen, when the school suddenly starting broadcasting over the PA the radio reports,  I also remember watching tv when Oswald was shot.  For any one visiting Dallas, we highly recommend this on your itinerary.  Gayle also recommends a visit to the George W. Bush presidential museum, there is an section dedicated to 9/11.  That will probably be my next trip.

The grandkids.  As always, a joy to see.  Grandma as usual had her bag of treats, her favorite books to read, stuffed animals, and of course clothes from her and auntie Judy.  The week before, we asked the oldest what he wanted us to bring and his response was shirts with buttons.  Not your usual request from a 3 year old.  The youngest reminded us of his uncle Jordan at that age.  Never sitting still and always ready to eat.

In short, we miss the boys, but Texas is still not calling us.  Only to visit.  There still is nothing like shorts year round, and the life we built here.  Southwest frequent flier miles and FaceTime will have to do.

The Forgotten and Blind Faith

It has been about a month since my last Chemo treatment but i have been feeling better only the last two weeks.  I was talking today to someone I have known since the college days about his bout with esophageal cancer.  There was a bond in shared experiences.  Surgery, Chemo, the affects during and the continuing reminders.  He is now 3 years cancer free.

It felt comforting to have the shared experiences.  It's one of those things that are hard to describe.  It is like being a grandparent.  Once you become one, you understand that look.  The look when you gaze upon the child in your arms.  It is different than when your child was born.  That next generation  that is a part of you.

The comfort in shared cancer experiences vary.  Gayle tried attending a cancer support group.  She found people where their personal situation was considerably more drastic.  But one common denominator was a lack of faith in God.  The suffering becomes self centered.  What I have been reading is that our faith in God diverts the suffering, the burden, to be given up, not just shared.  Of course I admit I have not gotten to that point yet.

The forgotten people are the support folks.  Especially family.  Gayle has been the rock, support and brunt of my emotional mood swings.  Pair that with her profession as a public school teacher, increases the pressures of life.  Which reinforces the concept that love is blind.

Pain in the XXXX

One of the permanent affects of the Chemo Therapy is neuropathy of the extremities.  In the past I have described it as a "fuzzy" feeling in my finger tips.  I have also been noticing it slightly in the bottom of my feet.  The fuzzy feeling is affecting my fine motor skills that require manual dexterity.  I notice my printing is now looking like my handwriting.  For those of you unfamiliar with my writing, I have printed ever since they stopped giving me a grade in handwriting.  I barely squeaked out Cs throughout grade school.  My printing has become somewhat distinct as it has evolved into a certain style.  It's current legibility is comparable to my 4 year old grandson's writing.

It has not detrimentally affected any other manual function.  Typing on the keyboard is a little strange.  The tactile feel is not quite there, and I have trouble using a track pad.  This will be a permanent result of chemo and one Dr. has recommended vitamin B12 as a possible aide in lessening the affect.  Time will also diminish the neuropathy, but to what extent is unknown.

Overall it is a small price to pay.  It is also a constant reminder of the cancer and it's possible comeback.  I'm currently reading a book by Phillip Yancy,  Where is God When it Hurts.  The first section is on the value of pain, and how it is a warning system.  It also goes into how pain enhances pleasure.  Interesting concepts.

Larry H Parker

I noticed recently that the lawyer commercials have changed over the years.  They were once dominated by Larry H Parker and Jacoby and Meyers.  Now its Joseph Emrani and a assortment of firms soliciting clients for various ailments.

It is now been two weeks since my last round of chemo pills.  Now I wait for the chemo drugs to filter out of my system.  The past few days I have been feeling better but still feel the affects of the drugs.  I still tremble when attempting to write,  Fuzzyness in the finger tips, slight tinge of the taste buds,  and fatigue.  

June will be my appointment with the oncologist to compare the scheduled tests with my baseline.  Those tests include a CT Scan and colonoscopy.

Today I met with the surgeon.  Interesting info.  He removed 40% of my colon.  Essentially everything is functioning well with a few adjustments in the bowel process that are permanent.
He did mention that the tingling in the hands will probably diminish with time but never go away completely as a result of chemo.

i did just get through watching an episode of Charlie Rose on cancer treatment.  Immunology Therapy appears to be the next frontier.  Apparently with colon cancer they are experimenting with applying it after chemo.

As with the lawyer commercials, cancer treatment will evolve.  (didn't think I would be able to tie those two together!)