Binge Watching Therapy

Shoyu on Rice part two:  As the news of my current condition continues to sink in, well I start wondering.  How lucky was I to not have another heart attack, the timing of the angiogram, a wife that has no problems taking me off at ER at odd hours and her gradual acceptance of my unusualness.  And of course, why me.

As I think about those possibilities and wait for the late night infusion of streaming typing, I decided to watch the Kaminsky Method.  Alan Arkin and Michael  Douglass star in a dramedy series on friendship and life in the elder years of life.  For some reason it made me laugh out loud.  I was on the     fringe of gloom and doom when I started to watch episode one.

The series forced me to identify with a lot of the attitudes and issues they lived.  The prostrate issue was hilarious for us old guys, but the difficulty in accepting friendship and the effects of friendship that are not necessarily the sweet and kind results of the Hallmark channel.  Things you that are at the tip of your tongue but are reluctant to release upon the world, especially in today's oppressive fear of offending anyone.  There exists a cruelty of friendship, and how we endure the joy in torturing each other.  The difficulty in admitting wrong when we can easily get away with things by just being old.

Ok, It's time to move beyond the bypass, cancer, missing colon, chemo brain, neuropathy, stents, endless prescriptions,  stiffness, pending medicare, but not ignore that they exist or have occurred .  The disturbing thought is that it is getting easier to see why people give up.  I will be OK as long as I don't end up in a nursing home where they put shoyu on my rice.

Shoyu on Rice

There are bad combinations in life.  We don't drive a vehicle while drunk, you don't pour shoyu ( soy sauce) on your rice and you don't binge watch Netflix after visiting the cardiologist.  Let me explain.

Today was the follow up to my angiogram last week.  Wait, you may recall my sneaking out of the hospital after my blood pressure spike during the holidays, the Dr. scheduled an angiogram as a precaution.   That is the procedure where they insert a catheter into your artery through your groin to see  if there are any obstructions in your heart.

If you go back far enough, you may recall I had quadruple bypass in 2016.  I had passed my treadmill stress test, EKG and echocardiogram six months prior to my heart attack.  It was described as unusual.  Remember that term.  I had a follow up treadmill stress test and echocardiogram 6 months ago with no issues but I was feeling fatigued.   I attributed the tiredness to the residual effects of the chemotherapy (you might have to read previous posts).  So my cardiologist scheduled the angiogram just in case.  Ahh those precautionary procedures just in case........

The procedure was scheduled the day after New Years, at a hospital further away (not within walking distance) and warnings that I had to have a ride home.   I kind of suspected someone warned the hospital of my adventure down Hawthorne Blvd.  It wasn't Gayle as I had previously booked her travel to Texas to see the grandsons and their new sister on New Years day.  She was not happy with my scheduling, but my economical cheapness won out as I didn't want to forfeit the cost of airline tickets.

My logic and argument was that it was just a simple quick outpatient procedure that will go smoothly and the likely hood of them finding any blockage was slim due to my passing all the previous tests.  I'm used to getting that look of doubt plus I was warned to send her prepared.  It was in the 30s in Dallas with a threat of snow  The first grand daughter and her crazy brothers won over gut feelings.

Angiogram result:  two major blockages and two stents inserted in the left anterior descending (LAD) artery, otherwise known as the widow maker, and yes, it was one of the bypassed arteries.  The only problem Is how do I inform Gayle without her freaking out or yelling.   Simple, you FaceTime her with the grandkids.   Evil.  I know, but it didn't quite work out as I planned as the phone call after the grandkids were preoccupied with a Pokemon film was a little more harsh.  And yes, Jared picked me up from the hospital.  Torrance Memorial was a little more prison like in their release procedures.

Today's follow up visit was simple.  Yes there was complete blockage in two spots,  I could have easily had a heart attack, which was probably avoided by the development of collateral arteries.  Two stents were inserted, but wait, if it clogged in the graft after 7 years, does this mean that it will again in another 7?  According to the Doc, the answer was no, but he did admit that it is unusual for this to occur in the LAD.  If I hear that term unusual again, I'm updating my will and planning my funeral (are we seeing a trend in the description as "unusual"?).

Shoyu on rice?  Tonight I binged The Kaminsky Method on Netflix.  Two old guys dealing with old age.  More on that later.  Go to go make my sandwich for tomorrow's lunch.

Preventing Nap Time

One of the things that always gets me in trouble is the attitude of "I can do that!".  How many times have I tackled a project at home as a result of I can do that, then in the middle of it, Im thinking, maybe I bit off a little too much.  Except it is too late.  Engineers are famous for that.  My wife (teachers) is also famous for that.  I have a history of taking on things at her encouragement.

As I contemplate ideas for a new short film, it is a combination of what the hell am I doing and hey, wouldn't it be neat if I could do the film on.....   But it come down to this is a story that needs to be told.  It is obvious that there are more folks out there that believe I can, but there remains the time and creativity to put it together.

I look at the styles that I can emulate.  I tend to find them on TV.  NHK is one of the channels I watch with a simple style of story telling and narration, I love the opening of the series the Closer.  I always liked the style of 60 minutes and it's format.  I like the theme songs of the Andy Griffith Show, WKRP, and of course Hawaii five O.  I tend to watch old tv shows late at night for ideas.

I notice on some shows the background music is the same or inappropriate, music rights are complicated and expensive.  It has gotten to the point what few movies I see, I look for music incorporation.  But our class is teaching us about the things that are not only basic, but what makes a good film.

All of these nuances enhance the film.  There is a difference between talking heads and an entertaining film.  30 seconds is an eternity on film where most cuts in TV are 5 to 10 seconds long,
We have an obligation to tell a story, but we have an obligation to create a film where people feel and understand the story and not want to walk out or take a nap.

The Sounds of Silence

I have noticed that which each visit to the hospital ERs, I find new rooms and additions I haven't seen before.  Wait, just how many times have I been in the ERs of Torrance Memorial and Providence Little Company of Mary?  Today was another visit, in a section I have never seen.  For some reason my BP was elevated and would not go down. Now my normal BP is on the high side with meds, but this time there were associated side affects that freaked Gayle out.

You know it is serious if you are taken in right away when you check in and never see the waiting room again.  The frequency of Nurses and Doctors coming in and out of your room indicates how serious your condition is.  Did you know that at 3 in the morning there aren't that many people in there?

I'm used to being in the hospital and it's procedures.  Go there and wait, get up and go over there for this test, return and wait.  Strip down and put on this gown, open side in back.  Roll over and let me perform these invasive procedures.  It's time to suck more blood out of that tube in your arm and by the way,  it's time for your hourly temp, BP and oxy level check, did I wake you?

Side note:  Gayle did not drop me off across the parking lot, but in front of the front door.  Which brings up the other side of these visits.  While it has become familiar and almost comfortable to me, it drives Gayle up the wall.  I can lay there in calm, pain or nauseousness, but she sits in constant turmoil and worry.  Something I tend to not see.  It is the family that suffers in silence.

You Might Be a Psychopath if You Like Your Coffee Black

A 2015 study from the University of Innsbruck in Austria found a trend that suggested a correlation between preferences for black coffee and other bitter tastes, and sadistic or psychopathic personality traits.   Wait,  I like it black........

Senior Occurences

Senior Occurrences is my euphemism for elderly events.   Or maybe Elderly events is a euphemism for old folks accidents.  Last week I was attending a series of lectures held at the Center for Democracy across from the JANM.  It conflicted with my video class at the Visual Communications Center around the corner and across the parking lot.

In my rush to get to class, I had asked a question of the guard as I was leaving the Democracy Center and turned to smash into the glass window with a bang. I quickly recovered and exited the center through the glass door and noticed I was bleeding profusely.  We all know nose bleeds can be a bit of a mess, and as blood was pouring out of me, I was rushing across the parking lot to the class.

As I entered the class I rushed by my classmates dumping my notebook and headed straight to the restroom.  It was there that I started to realize how much I was bleeding.  It took about a good 30 minutes for the bleeding to stop and puzzled looks from my classmates.  They were more worried about my condition than I was, but then I didn't really see all the blood over my face and clothes.

Trips, falls, wrong turns, mis-identified facts, forgotten names are becoming more frequent.  I first tried to attribute it to the heart attack or chemo brain, but I am realizing that it is more about old age.
I was hoping to be one of those old folks whose brain is still sharp as a tack.  In fact one of my classmates can be defined that way.  But I am starting to doubt my brain will outlast my body.  Of course it helps to have an exceptional brain to begin with.....

This week as I attended my VC class, I was able to follow my trail of blood up the back stairs and was relieved that it stopped at the door.  Did I mention that the sun was shining brightly through the glass? Or at least I think it was.....

                                             The window is on the right, door on the left.

Adding Insult to Injury

I have be watching the World Series between the Dodgers and Red Sox.  Or more accurately, dozing off during the World Series.  Don't tell any one, but I'm not a fan of new baseball.  Analytics, the in and outs of multiple pitchers, but I do admire the many 100 mph pitchers with multiple Tommy John surgeries.

Im still mourning Vince Scully and yes I'm still ticked at Time Warner, now known as Spectrum for stealing the last years of listening to Vinny. As a Angeleno that once moved away for awhile, growing up with Vinny's voice is one thing, missing that voice from far away as you listen to vastly inferior story telling is torture.

The new replacement (I still don't know his name) and his partner Orel, are ok.  But they talk way too much.  Vinny was the master, fewer words, better stories and descriptions of the game.

The Insult?  Fox is running two commercials with his voice over.  One for the Children's Hospital and once of him reading a poem for T Mobile.  Everytime I hear them, it jogs the memory.  The brain goes, wait..... hey, isn't that Vince Scully? and I miss him more.

Here's to Vinny and his many years of comfort listening pleasure.