My Safety Net goes back to college this weekend. He has been shadowing me like his brother did when recovering from bypass. Only I could probably sneak out without him knowing it, but have gotten used to him just driving me around. I am more agreeable to being dependent these days.
I have made comments on how aging has progressed and shown up physically. The other age factor is the maturation of the 3 sons. Jeff turned thirty last week. My youngest can drink legally and today is Jordan's 28th birthday. He is number two. I'm always amazed at his willingness (or naive) to try things. Not too many people would plop themselves in France for School without any knowledge of the language. Or move to another state to start Law School. Thankfully Auntie Phyllis was there to provide some assistance and the knowledge there will always be a meal waiting.
I was hoping to be more descriptive on the process of going through Chemo, but have not been able to express the experience yet. It is usually confined to I'm doing OK, nations and tired, with little appetite. But that does not really give the reader a grasp of the experience. I am hoping that one of these late nights it will hit me and come pouring out. You can tell It's late in the morning and I'm listening to a Bee Gees PBS concert in the background.
I have heard many stories of folks that have bouts with cancer. Some are positive, some are not so positive. Every time I have come to the point where I am sure I will survive this, a news report or a casual remark will bring back the reality that death does occur. Eventually. But as a friend has put it, it is not my time. That is my safety net that I am clinging to. Hope in that it is not my time yet.
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