Ol Tannenbaum

 Ok, I admit, I am currently watching a Hallmark Christmas movie.  The plot is all the same, everynight, Nov. thru Dec. and even July.  I won't mention that in all those Christmas movies, Christ is seldom mentioned and even mispronounced when referring to the Holidays.  It has become generic.

I spent my high school years in the southern part of the state of Washington.  Minority of 1.5.  It was known for DB Cooper and Mt. St. Helens.  Vancouver, Washington.  you always attached Washington as most would assume that I was Canadian.  One winter, some friends of mine decided to cut down their own Christmas tree.  The National Forest was within spitting distance and for a two dollar permit, you could cut down your own tree.  

We suspect our selected trees were destined for toilet paper, as the problem is that one forest looks like any other.  In other words the National Forest is indistinguishable from Weyerhauser land.  Weyerhauser was the paper company that owned their own mountains of trees and often were responsible for those patches of bare land on the back side of the mountains.  A former beautiful landscape that looked like the barren hills of LA sprinkled with toothpicks.  Most roads were barely one lane, soaked in oil (vs asphalt) and shared with large logging trucks that ate Volkswagens for lunch.

 In a forest, all trees look alike and ironically size is hard to judge.  We should have figured that out when we had trouble tieing them down to an old Dodge Dart.  Youth sees no obstacles or common sense.  At the time, my dad and I lived in a duplex above the garage.  The driveway sloped down to a depth of a basement.  My sister was home for the holidays and was watching from the upper window.  When I propped the tree upright in the driveway, she could look straight ahead at the tip of the tree.  I had to chop off about a third off the bottom of the tree.

The other issue of a natural forest, all trees look the same, Mother Nature does not naturally shape trees to resemble the neighborhood Christmas tree lot inventory.  Christmas tree growers trim and shape specially bred trees for our holiday pleasure.  I think the natural trees of Washington and Oregon look more like mature Charley Brown trees.  I had to take the discarded bottom, take selected branches, drill holes in the trunk and insert to fill the large gaps.  Dr. Frankenstein would be proud.  

I have spent the rest of my adult life selling Christmas trees.  I worked the Lucky Market Tree lot when I worked my way through college, the YMCA tree lot for my son's Indian Guides program and the West High Entertainment Unit tree lot.  I found myself ordering, pricing and hoping we sell out.  Competition was Home Depot, the Pop Up tree lots down the street and the famed Torrance Y lot. I would personally pick and deliver trees to family friends.  Ironically we have for years decorated our house with artificial trees due to ours son's allergies and asthma.  Our latest is from Costco, including lights.

I need to get back to the Hallmark movie to see how it ended.  I have yet to see one where they don't get together, but I keep hoping.  Bahhh Humbug !!